Hi Friends,
Well, maybe not exactly breaking up.
More like Ross and Rachel…
We’re on a break.
Before anyone gets too excited, no, my cancer hasn’t gone away. The pleural effusion hasn’t magically disappeared either. As far as I know, they’re both still there.
But for the next three months, unless my body gives me a compelling reason otherwise, I’m done letting them occupy so much space in my mind.
Cancer and I are taking a break.
That doesn’t mean I won’t be interviewing doctors or people affected by cancer—I already have some wonderful guests scheduled.
But it does mean I’m taking a break from constantly talking about the perfect diet, the latest protocol, or the next thing that’s supposed to fix everything.
No trying to solve cancer every day.
No obsessing over every ache, pain, twinge, cough, or sensation.
No making cancer the main character in every conversation.
For nearly four years, cancer has occupied far more space in my mind than I ever wanted it to. Some of that was necessary. Some of it was fear. Some of it was hope. And some of it was simply the reality of navigating a difficult diagnosis.
But somewhere along the way, I realized something important:
I may not be able to control whether I have cancer, but I can control whether cancer has me.
So between now and my next scans in September, I’m choosing something different.
I’m choosing to focus on my husband, my pups, my new home in the desert, the shows I want to do, the books I want to read, the places I want to go, the meals I want to enjoy, trying to make new friends, and all the little moments of living I’ve been missing while waiting for answers.
I’m choosing to spend less time trying to prolong my life and more time actually living it.
Will cancer still be there when my next scans roll around?
Probably.
Will I have to deal with whatever those scans reveal?
Of course.
My scans are exactly 12 weeks away.
On September 21, I’ll meet with Dr. Thomas to review the scan results, followed by my oncologist, Dr. Myall.
I suppose if anyone is qualified to grant parole from my self-imposed stay of execution, it would be those two.
But thinking about that day every day won’t change the outcome.
What it can change is June, July, and August.
And I don’t want to spend those months waiting.
I want to spend them living.
Cancer has already taken enough from me.
I’m not giving it my summer too.
For the next 12 weeks, cancer gets the middle finger. 😆
Not because I’m cured.
Not because I’m in denial.
Not because I’ve stopped caring.
But because I refuse to spend the entire summer waiting for September.
So if you’re looking for constant cancer updates, there probably won’t be many.
But if you’re looking for me and want to hang out, I’ll be at improv class four times a week.
Because between now and September, I have a life to live.
And that’s exactly what I intend to do.
And if you love vegan vanilla ice cream, maybe we can meet at Chef Tanya’s Kreamery to enjoy a Haboob.
Because I ain’t eating any more kale—EVER! 🤣
Love & Living,
Chef AJ
🦴🐾🐶 From the Puppy Files 🐶🐾🦴
I’ve been obsessed with making one of my favorite new recipes, the Cranberry Pistachio Oat Cookies, which I recently demonstrated in my community. I love everything pistachio, especially Haboobs! I couldn’t find my measuring cup. Now you know why. 😂
What Brought Me Joy This Week
I taught my first class at Kitchen Kitchen. The last time I did a live cooking class was nearly 5 years ago, and we were still wearing masks. In person is so much more fun and gratifying than Zoom!
I made my famous Disappearing Lasagna, but now I make an improved version. Instead of using beans or tofu for the filling (which many people, including me, are allergic to or intolerant of), I make a homemade almond ricotta using the recipe from Miyoko Schinner’s book, Artisan Vegan Cheese. It’s so easy to make with just 2 ingredients, and it yields an even richer, more authentic lasagna.
Next to me in this photo is the fabulous owner, Jan, who has the most magnificent store of unique kitchen tools and gifts. I thought I had seen every kitchen store there was to see until I walked into Kitchen Kitchen in Indian Wells.
Imagine if Williams-Sonoma and Sur La Table had a quirky, fun-loving cousin obsessed with cooking, gadgets, specialty ingredients, and helping people fall back in love with their kitchens. That’s Kitchen Kitchen.
The store is packed with unique finds, clever tools, beautiful cookware, gourmet ingredients, and gifts you won’t see everywhere else. I can honestly spend an hour wandering the aisles and still find something new.
If you’re local and haven’t been there yet, do yourself a favor and go. Just don’t blame me if you walk out with a bag full of things you didn’t know you needed.
I also made my most popular appetizer, the Perfect Pesto Stuffed Mushrooms.
I’ve been making these at every party I’ve hosted for nearly 25 years, and I thought I knew every trick in the book. Then my sous-chef Anthony showed me a better way. Instead of filling each mushroom with a spoon, he used a pastry bag to pipe the filling. Why didn’t I think of that? It was quicker and cleaner, and it made the whole process ridiculously easy.
The class was made even more special because my “Anesthesia Angel”, Dr Michael Kessler, showed up with his beautiful wife, Lani.
If you’re wondering about my chef coat, it was hand-painted by a local artist, Julie Smith. You can find her work here: https://www.instagram.com/jasartwear/
Where You Won’t Find Me
If you’ve sent me a Facebook message, tagged me on Instagram, or wondered why I haven’t responded, there’s a simple explanation: I removed both Facebook and Instagram from my phone.
I still post occasionally when I have something I want to share, but I don’t use social media to communicate anymore. I don’t see direct messages, tags, reels, memes, comments, or notifications.
So if you don’t hear back from me, please don’t take it personally. I’m not ignoring you—I never saw it.
And if you’re thinking about sending me a reel, meme, quote, or video, save yourself the effort. 😊 I know they’re sent with love, but I won’t see those either.
If there’s something truly important related to my work, my team can be reached at [email protected].